Tentang Nina Harfin #4

Few days later, we started to skype. He was nicer that he seemed. Surprisingly, we had a nice convo though chat apps. We share the same value so it wasn’t hard to have a real discussion with him, like school, work-life balance, living abroad, and everything else.
For me, it was casual and we didn’t talk anything personal at all. It was less ‘lagi apa’ thingies, and more talking about an issue.
B-o-r-i-n-g.
But honestly, at that time I found it verrry interesting. So I thought that was how people start in love, wasn’t it?

I knew I started to like him, but I also knew that

Not everything that I liked was supposed to be mine.

 I was so far away from the thought of dating him.

Tentang Nina Harfin #3

Nothing’s changed. He didn’t try to reach me or anything. And I got bored of wondering about this guy. So I decided to find the answer by myself, I decided to text him with a Hi.

Before that I argued with myself: what would you say? What if he didn’t respond? What if he thought you’re weird for chat a random guy? And other what if until I couldn’t stand it and just texted him just to find out.

Hours later, he answered.

And I drew the biggest smile on that day. He wasn’t awkward, he wasn’t cold. He was nice though, and as if we had known each other before, while we hadn’t.

Few chats later he texted me
With a picture
Of his lunch.

How could I not surprise to have someone that was near stranger sent you a picture of his lunch?
But that was a good surprise, though.


To add more surprise, I asked him to exchange postcards. And he agreed. I wrote those letters few weeks later, went to Pos Indonesia right after, post those letters to this guy, and a week before his departure back to Indonesia he received that. And I never got the postcard he sent.

p.s.: he had to phone call me whenever he read my letter because he couldn’t read my handwritings. Poor me.

Tentang Nina Harfin #2

Days went on and he still loved every posts that I had posted. I barely knew him. I just knew he traveled a lot. At that time, He just went back from Bangkok. According to Uti, who had been a best friend of mine since 2 years ago, he’s my type. So I thought, he must be my type (yes, I have a strong belief in my best friends).

That curiosity grew more, and weeks later, it was enough to make me write.

My first writing for him.

(yes, i wrote even for someone that I didn't know yet.)

(and he printscreen-ed it, felt like it was for him. yes, it was for you!)

Tentang Nina Harfin #1

This long journey started by a casual night out with the girls.

“Eh ini ada nih namanya Alfian Harfin, suka nge love semua post aku deh di path di Instagram, padahal kenal juga enggak kayaknya…”

“Masa nggak kenal sih Nin? Itu loh, Harfin..”

“Bukan Alfian ya? tau sih, satu SMP sama aku. Tapi aku kayaknya nggak pernah kenal. Ya nggak papa sih sebenernya, hak-hak dia. Nggak penting juga.” I thought, I should’ve not care about that, but the fact that his name came out every single time after I posted stuffs made me wonder.

We shared the silence for a few seconds, until she talked to me with full of excitement.

“Eh tapi… sumpah, sumpah. Dia kayaknya tipe kamu banget deh. Serius deh nin, kayaknya dia tipe kamu banget. Sumpah sumpah... Mau aku kenalin? Eh.... tapi aku juga nggak kenal sih...” said Uti who always thought that I never dated my type of guy.


And my curiosity grew from that.

Deleting Instagram

no, not the account.
and no, no, not forever.
but once in a while.


Sebenernya, saya udah sering delete berbagai app social media di handphone sejak di bangku SMA. Tiap mau ujian, saya suka delete social media atau minta sahabat saya buat ganti password sampai ujian selesai. makin kesini, kadang yang bikin pengen stop bukan karena saya ada ujian, tapi karena emang capek sama konten social media itu sendiri.

Beberapa waktu lalu, ada yang merasa tersindir sama konten quotes yang saya post. Sedih, sih. karena tiap saya nge post curhatan, ya saya post untuk membuat saya merasa lebih baik to make me feel better, atau untuk mengingatkan saya bahwa saya nggak sendirian. Eh, hal itu malah jadi a powerful weapon to hurt other's feelings out of my intention. Setelah itu, saya jadi lebih parno; menyortir following dan follower, membuat akun saya jadi private, dan jadi mikir berkali-kali untuk post sesuatu. Setelah saya pikir-pikir lagi, kenapa saya sampe jadi segininya ya? Saya menghabiskan banyak waktu untuk menyortir konten sosial medi saya sendiri, knowing that it could be good or bad depend on the consumer's view.

Tiap saya pulang kerja, saya menghabiskan 1-2 jam untuk catch up konten yang saya miss waktu di kantor, dan rasanya jadi nggak produktif banget! Sebagai anak yang suka baca dan nulis, waktu kreatif saya jadi berkurang jauh sejak ada social media . Kadang suka kepikiran juga, enakan dulu ya, knowing i managed my time better waktu di SMP, dimana waktu 1-2 jam abis di friendster, tapi kalau komputer mati, all i have is just books and notes.

Spreading good and bad vibes is also way easier using social media. Konten yang tidak disaring, yang ada 24/7 bikin saya nggak bisa 'kabur' dari pengaruh-pengaruh itu, mau yang baik atau yang buruk. Rasanya kontrol diri sendiri terhadap environment luar jadi minimal banget. *sigh*

So i decided to delete the app once in a while, for a day or two, or even for a week. kalo lagi pengen tau berita masa kini, i go into the instagram via www, checking my idols (selebgram inspirasyenel yang kontennya nggak melulu soal endorsment, fashion and traveling).

I've been doing this since 2-3 weeks ago, and I already feel happier and more productive. Kadang-kadang bingung sih, waktu senggang buat apa ya. Tapi ternyata, bosan itu penting, biar otak kita mikir apa yang bisa kita lakukan dan akhirnya terjadilah proses kreatif masing-masing pribadi. Seneng juga, keluar dari environment visual-aesthetic, yang kadang bikin mudah terobsesi tapi nggak mudah untuk dikejar dan nggak banyak manfaatnya juga, karena that's simply not my plate. I was a deviantart active user, platform berbasis digital art. Tapi platform itu bener-bener pure memamerkan artwork kita, istilahnya gallery online. Sedangkan instagram, visual yang dijual kalo nggak wonderful places, beauty faces, cool outfits, and branded stuffs.

Sejauh ini, saya merekomendasikan banget untuk melakukan ini once in a while. Meanwhile, we can do things we love for our own sakes tanpa sibuk ngeliatin atau menyusun feed:)