this is kinda hard for me, to write such an epilogue for this goddamn year. a year which showed me variety of love, kinds of friends, the strength of a dream and a thing called faith to God. ups and downs will always be there fulfilling the day by day for a whole year, and it'll be repeated for the next year.
i got close with a guy, who made me happy, who was there anytime i need; but i simply didn't feel the sparkle of the thing we called love. no heartbeat, no so-happy-moment, or something. we just realized it then we got separated. it wasn't like we had a relationship. but eight months close was special. then i let go a guy because i thought a friend would be so much worthy, but until now, i can't say anything about this. i can't say it was a good or bad choice. but i know God has done what's good for me. and i built a real relationship, but it was fake enough to make me realize that it would not be good. it was ended soon as i made a priority. as if my sister knew what i know about him, she'd be understand more.
lesson's learned: that i have to meet the jerk ones so i can be thankful of a guy God will give me in the end.
what i've been thankful so much about 2010 is i get back my closest mates of junior high. we grew up, we got apart, but then age realizing us something; that understanding is a matter. i love them:) in 2010 i also found some good friends. but there are fake ones among them. they talked behind my back. they disscussed about my bad attitude, instead of telling me the truth, give me advice and let me do instropection. they treated me badly. but then, they were nice to me sometimes. so i don't really think about that. all i'm gonna do is dong a betterment; be a growing self.
lesson's learned: that i may need some close friends to share with, i need to fit in, but just stay true, keep myself on the first priority, forgive quickly, forget about the bad ones:)
i've been dreaming about being a doctor since the first year in high school. i've posted so many things about that things, about the reasons, about the vision, and all. and it's a stepping year to get that dream. 2011 will be door to that dream. i have to study sooooooooo hard to get that. i know it won't be easy, or if it's easy, it'll lose its meaning. i don't wanna waste my time. i'm gonna do all my best to get that. what makes me sad is people are just too ambitious to get what they want in a bad way. some of people are planning to cheat using a collaguage ticket or a large amount of money to get into the university they want. and for me, i'm letting go of my ego about going to the best uni; what's matter is doing a good thing, working hard, and still on a right path. i know God will give me the best as if i do my best too:) during my downs, what made me standing strong for more was my dream. dream is a hope of future which present doesn't give. dream does betterment to me. dream makes me closer to God. dream does everything i need to have a quality life:)
lesson's learned: dream is the greatest invisible gift God has given to me that has made so many both invisible and visible blessings to me.
this year is another step to get me close to Allah. things go rough lately, then i had no power at all. but when i tried to get closer to God, it was like something to hold on. something to help me go trough all of the things. Allah has been really nice to me. He always answered my question (which lately i got it less than ever). Ramadhan was the month when i felt like He talked to me most. but then, lately, these weeks, i just feel like He's too quite. maybe it's because i've been examined and i haven't done it well. when i finish it all, Allah will talk to me as before. Allah is the GREATEST gift since i was born. Allah is the thing that makes my life easier to get trough. thanks Allah, to let me be a muslim since i was born. that was the biggest thing i should be thankful of. thanks for being there, always.
lesson's learned: religion is more than having the name of God on your bible, it's a faith that lead us to have a better life:)
done for reviewing 2010. and resolution for 2011?
1. get into best medical school.
2. get closer to Allah, family and friends.
3.be the better version of me
4. get perfect GPA for the whole academic year..
5.make new friends
6.help more people.
7.be able to drive car, cook some meals, and play piano:)
that's it. what about yours?:)
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